Following Up

In order for me to vote, I have to believe. I live in California, a state that recalled its governor so it could put the Terminator in his place with even less of the populace voting for him than voted to keep Gray Davis. Our economy is worse off than before the recall, is headed into the dump at a faster rate than before and most of the safety nets have been eliminated by the Governator. Did I vote for Arnold? No. Did I vote to keep Gray Davis? Yes. Did my vote count? No, neither time. When I think that my vote will be worth something, I'll vote. Until then, forget it.

Earlier this week I was reading an RSS feed from JurassicPork's blog. His parenthetical statement wasn't included and so when I read about the death of the mother of the writer, I assumed that it was JP's and jumped over to comment and express my condolences. He ripped me a new one both on the blog and in a private email. I should have known it wasn't his writing, there wasn't enough anger but he certainly made up for it in the comments. Even when a few people tried to support me it didn't stop him. I don't need that in my life. I'll read what he writes but I will never comment there again. I can go to Freeper sites for that kind of treatment.

I have enough problems with my life as it is and living in a constant state of anger and being attacked by people in anger is just not my idea of a good time. My asthma has been out of control all week, grief, anger and a cold I can't seem to kick do that to me. Every day I have the frustration of dealing with my mom who is slowly dying. She coughs and chokes and lights up another cigarette. She sits out in the cold and wind, staring at nothing. I have to redo everything she does because our versions of clean are so different and I can remember when it was the other way around. I have two brothers who offer nothing but excuses. No money, no help, they barely visit her. She's dying of a broken heart and I can't help her.

To cap it all off, yesterday I received a letter and I have to tell my boss that he is going to San Quentin for a minimum of 30 days and a maximum of 90. This is going to destroy his business, completely total whatever is left of my finances and put several other people (with families) out of work. Today I have to tell him and it isn't going to be easy. Needless to say, my patience with petty bullshit like the election is nil. The only difference between the candidates is who is pulling the strings and that really isn't a choice for me.

I will continue to voice my opinion about some things but the election most likely won't be one of them. It isn't an election, it's a popularity contest and ideas and ethics just get in the way so they dispensed with those and reduced it to a gender, religious or race issue. I'm sorry if anyone is disappointed in me, trust me you aren't the first and probably won't be the last.

Big Brass Blog